Guy who converted to church 2 years ago still pronouncing “Deseret” like it’s a French word

OLYMPIA, WA- Otis Benningsley, 35, continues to pronounce “Deseret” as if it is a French word, even though he recently celebrated his 2nd anniversary in the LDS Church.

Fellow members of the Olympia First Ward have taken notice of this blunder. “He keeps saying it ‘Des-er-AY.’ He never pronounces the t,” said Andrew Haigle, Sunday School President. “What, does he think we’re in Quebec or something?”

“It wouldn’t be a big deal if he didn’t say it a lot,” said Shelly Brown, who serves on the Relief Society Presidency at Olympia First. “But, my goodness, it’s all the time! He’s like, ‘Let’s sing In Our Lovely Deser-AY!’ ‘Did you know that Deser-AY means beehive?’ ‘Why does Deser-AY Book smell so funny?’”

“I mean, we say it right all the time!” she added. “Even more now with a lot of emphasis on the ‘ET’ at the end of the word, and he still doesn’t change. I don’t know what to do anymore!”

Trent Thigpen, Bishop of Olympia First, has major concerns about Benningsley’s progress. “After two years in the church, there are some expectations you’ve got to meet,” Thigpen said. “There’s the obvious of attaining the Melchizedek Priesthood and becoming temple worthy, but you’ve got to know the Mormon Lingo.”

“It’s pretty clear there is no compatibility with France and the Celestial Kingdom. If Otis ever wants all that God has, he’d better start pronouncing his t’s.”