Friday, December 5, 2008

Guy who converted to church 2 years ago still pronouncing “Deseret” like it’s a French word

OLYMPIA, WA- Otis Benningsley, 35, continues to pronounce “Deseret” as if it is a French word, even though he recently celebrated his 2nd anniversary in the LDS Church.

Fellow members of the Olympia First Ward have taken notice of this blunder. “He keeps saying it ‘Des-er-AY.’ He never pronounces the t,” said Andrew Haigle, Sunday School President. “What, does he think we’re in Quebec or something?”

“It wouldn’t be a big deal if he didn’t say it a lot,” said Shelly Brown, who serves on the Relief Society Presidency at Olympia First. “But, my goodness, it’s all the time! He’s like, ‘Let’s sing In Our Lovely Deser-AY!’ ‘Did you know that Deser-AY means beehive?’ ‘Why does Deser-AY Book smell so funny?’”

“I mean, we say it right all the time!” she added. “Even more now with a lot of emphasis on the ‘ET’ at the end of the word, and he still doesn’t change. I don’t know what to do anymore!”

Trent Thigpen, Bishop of Olympia First, has major concerns about Benningsley’s progress. “After two years in the church, there are some expectations you’ve got to meet,” Thigpen said. “There’s the obvious of attaining the Melchizedek Priesthood and becoming temple worthy, but you’ve got to know the Mormon Lingo.”

“It’s pretty clear there is no compatibility with France and the Celestial Kingdom. If Otis ever wants all that God has, he’d better start pronouncing his t’s.”

5 comments :

Ty said...

“It’s pretty clear there is no compatibility with France and the Celestial Kingdom."
LOL

Mike & Amanda said...

I'm beginning to notice an anti-French trend in some of these writings...Maybe we could hear from the other side, what the French have contributed. Renault diesels, topless beaches, fine wine....nope, nope, guess you were right. Looks like the Frenchies don't make it.

the_mormonion said...

I'll try to leave France alone for awhile....

Anonymous said...

Est-ce que tu aurais un problème avec la France? Tu veux qu'on en discute?
I always thought that one of my biggest stumbling bloke is my ancestry.
And talking about the topless beaches I have to tell you a secret...they are very few French women doing it. Most of the time they are foreigners and VERY often American.
But shhhh...

Jen said...

I almost peed my pants reading this. Thanks for the laughs!